of sidewalk chalk
and riding in the backseat
while my role model
was chain smoking in the front
As glamorous as the heroin chic models
of those late 90's days
I remember wearing her heels
when she was just seventeen
looking at the stars
with her friends
the smell of cheap beer
and even cheaper whiskey
mixed with cigarette smoke
That was the perfume I'll never forget
Now I'm seventeen and smoking
is considered passe
and I can't drink to save my life
I still look at the stars
Though I can't help but feel alone
with concrete as my pillow
I want to go lay in the road
but I'm not ready to die
before I have really lived
The heels I wear now
are my tools of seduction
for the sake of my own soul
Understanding sets in to why she cried
when he died
Why she dove into the bleakest point
of her life
because whether
she believed it or not
she loved him
and he thought he was invincible
but really he was just a boy
tumbling down from a heady high
denial became her thing
and it still is
I laugh because
the same blood runs
through my veins
It's quite obvious
I too avoid reality
Proving we are alike
in ways known and unknown
Relishing the fact
that the past holds the future
***Dedicated to Lizzy***
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